What a great transformation. I'm tickled that you got both outfits, go you

: Lovely Janice
: I'm looking forwards to more stories
: as well .

: I just had a then and now experience.
: It might seem a bit frivolous but
: it is a huge thing for me

: A big piece for me has been finding
: out about beta endorphin and how
: that works with me. I've always
: appeared really quite successful -
: whether in career or friends or
: family. But underneath the act
: there was no self confidence at
: all.

: So a wedding, years ago. I wore an
: old dress because it was the only
: thing that fitted. I had been
: shopping and got upset in the
: changing rooms trying to find
: something new, but everything
: looked dreadful. I heard guests
: say about me, oh I wouldn't have
: recognised her she got so fat. At
: the friends photographs I was
: hiding. For the group photo, I
: couldn't escape so I hid right at
: the back, and the photographer
: tried to pull me forwards and I
: wouldn't go. Afterwards my friend
: told me she was upset I wasn't
: on the photos and she could only see
: my hat . Well that suited me. The
: whole thing was an awful ordeal. I
: was tearful in the weeks before,
: overcome with emotion on the day
: and sad afterwards. Not that
: anyone would have known.

: But my friend had wanted me there no
: matter what and wanted me recorded
: in the day, which didn't happen..
: Sad, isn't it.

: I went shopping the other week for a
: future wedding. (Its actually
: wonderful to know I will still fit
: in my dress on the day as I used
: to be very variable with clothes).
: I am really looking forwards to
: it. I went shopping and tried on
: eight outfits. Some of them looked
: awful, but that was ok because
: they weren't the right design for
: me. Some looked ok. Two looked
: amazing. So I bought both to treat
: myself. I will be just great at
: this wedding . No need to hide or
: feel less-than, I will look a
: million dollars, be present and
: involved and have a great time.
: And take those happy memories
: forwards with me. Such a
: difference.