I connected with your post when you talked about visiting your mother. I always have trouble when I visit a sister. She teases me about my continual diets. I've tried to explain the program, but to her it's just another diet, so I keep my mouth shut and try not to use her attitude as an excuse to make bad food choices. Frustrating isn't it?

I've spent a life time trying to make self improvements. Sometimes I'm shocked to realize how little progress I've made. But what if I don't try?

I can't imagine where I'd be if I didn't fight for this program. I'm working now to get back on track after a long winter of little slips that blossomed into full relapse. Having spent more than a decade in recovery, with two major relapses, I know the difference the program makes in my life and it's worth every effort we can make to work the steps.

: First Katherine, you are amazing. I
: just read an email from her that
: newbies can get "wobbly"
: at my point - just starting and
: the enthusiasm is waning. She
: suggested that I connect to the
: forum.

: Rather than run and hide I'm taking
: her advice. Some background -
: ACOA, I just turned 63, and have
: been battling obesity, isolation,
: and depression my whole life. I've
: been in therapy for over 20 years.
: Like many of us, I get temporary
: relief but find myself back in the
: black pit of despair.

: The present: So... I've been on step
: 1 for 2 months and was really
: feeling the benefit of breakfast.
: But, guess I had to sabotage
: myself. Besides the sugar
: addiction, gluten is dangerous for
: me as it causes depression. I just
: got back from a trip to visit my
: mother and sister in Florida and
: while I was there threw out
: everything nutritionally that I've
: learned because I just could not
: tell them I was making yet another
: attempt to overcome my issues. My
: mother, in particular, goes out of
: her way to disparage anything
: positive that happens. I told
: myself it would just be easier to
: pretend that I have given up and
: eat anything I wanted.

: This is harder than I thought it
: would be... I'm starting to
: realize this is much more
: complicated than just giving up
: sugar. I have an addiction to
: overcome. Commitment has not been
: one of my virtues but this time if
: I can't fully commit I'm not going
: to walk away and will keep trying.