Breakfast is still steady and I enjoy the journal. Sometimes I struggle with the feelings section, I often have to go through the list of feelings in the front of the journal, looking for the right emotional label.

I've always ignored the negative and pushed on to the silver linings. My upbringing has taught me not to air dirty laundry, don't be selfish, make the best of the situation, and no one wants to hear you bitch. I'm ashamed of myself on the rare moments when I .express negative feelings or gossip...another of my mother's big no-no's.

Overall I've found these lessons to be a positive force in my life, but now I'm wondering if I'm a master at hiding my feelings from myself. Do I eat and smoke to ease anxiety rather than taking a good look at what I actually feel and want for myself?