Thank you Allison
I have been here for part of your journey. You have been one of the ones whom have helped me heal. I have made many of your “desserts”!
Merry Christmas and a big thank you for sharing and helping me.
Chloe
Healing is grand

: *so many birds in our yard this
: morning enjoying the bird bath and
: feeders, including bluebirds and
: Cedar Waxwings
: *my dog lying behind me on the bed
: with his head resting on my legs

: 20 years ago, two life-changing
: things happened. The first was
: that I got a dog. I had always
: loved dogs, and grew up with a dog
: in the household, but once I left
: home, I just had cats, and later
: parrots and reptiles as well,
: because they were easier. (Well,
: birds are not necessarily easier,
: but you can go away overnight
: without a pet sitter, and they
: don't have to be walked.) But in
: 1998, my friend got dogs, and
: because I spent so much time with
: her and was consequently doing
: lots of dog things, I decided I
: might as well get a dog. My friend
: actually found my dog for me. The
: dog was in a shelter, and she
: called me up and we went together
: to meet the dog. When I first met
: Patches, she was very overweight
: and didn't really seem to have
: much personality. I took her for a
: little walk and she wasn't very
: responsive. I decided she needed
: my help, and she got along with
: cats, so I brought her home.

: It was one of the best decisions I
: ever made. I started taking
: Patches for walks. I explored my
: whole neighborhood, and then I
: started taking her to a beautiful
: park by the river. We met other
: people and their dogs. She began
: to lose weight slowly. She would
: try to play with the other dogs,
: but she couldn't keep up with
: them. The other dogs would run in
: a circle, and, being a Border
: Collie cross, she instinctively
: knew that she could catch up with
: them by cutting through the middle
: of the circle. After I had her for
: a couple of months, she got really
: sick, and we discovered that she
: was hypothyroid. Once she started
: on medication, she lost weight
: more rapidly and perked up. She
: became a joyful dog.

: I got Patches in May. In November, I
: decided I was really tired of
: being so depressed and feeling
: lousy. I was 39, and I decided
: that my 40's were going to be
: better than my 30's. I was talking
: to my massage therapist about how
: I was having constant blood sugar
: crashes, and I was hyper all day
: and exhausted in the evening. She
: asked me what I was eating, and
: then told me I needed more protein
: and I should do the Zone Diet. I
: went out and bought the book. I
: quickly realized that the only way
: I would get enough food on the
: diet was to eat protein,
: vegetables and whole grains. I was
: willing to do whatever it took,
: and I just told myself that
: because I didn't actually need to
: lose weight, I'd still eat the
: other stuff if I went to a party
: or on special occasions. The book
: said to expect to feel lousy at
: first, and I did for about a week.
: Then I began to notice that I
: wasn't starving an hour after
: breakfast now that I was eating
: protein, and that I had more
: energy. And the black cloud was
: starting to lift. Then my friend
: had a party. I went and ate
: everything I always used to have
: at parties: cookies, champagne,
: sugar, sugar, sugar etc. That
: evening I got really tired, got a
: horrible headache and went home
: and yelled at my pets all evening.
: The next day, I woke up with a
: horrible headache and bottomless
: pit hungerAt that point I realized
: that I either needed to eat some
: sugar regularly or not at all to
: avoid that. I was feeling so much
: better without it that I decided
: not to eat it. Shortly after, I
: read about Potatoes not Prozac and
: thought, "This sounds like
: what is wrong with me" so on
: my lunch break, I walked up to a
: bookstore and started looking at
: the book. When I got to the
: section that lists the symptoms of
: low beta endorphin in a chart, I
: knew I had found the answer.
: Everything I hated about myself
: was listed as a symptom of low
: beta endorphin. I bought the book
: and started following the program.
: I emailed Kathleen with a question
: and she referred me to the forum
: and I have been here ever since.
: That was in December of 1998.

: So, despite the fact that it did work
: for me, I do not at all recommend
: doing the program the way I did,
: cold turkey. I have seen many,
: many people try it that way and
: almost all of them crash and burn
: and then start over. Following the
: steps is much better. Also, when
: you do the steps slowly, you have
: all sorts of wonderful discoveries
: along the way, which I missed
: because everything happened so
: fast. I always think of it like
: the difference between watching a
: herd of cattle go through a gate
: one by one, versus watching the
: same herd of cattle stampede
: through the gate. The cattle end
: up in the same place, but in one
: case there are details, and in the
: other it's a messy blur. Also,
: despite the fact that some things
: did change for me early on, it
: took me just as long to get really
: stable as it does for people who
: do the steps as they are written.
: And because I gave up sugar before
: I was really ready, I spent the
: first year obsessively coming up
: with program-friendly desserts and
: eating a lot of fat.

: But I made it, I never looked back,
: and I am still here doing the
: program and hanging out on the
: forum today. My dog and I had many
: wonderful adventures. Doing the
: program allowed me to be in the
: moment, so on our walks, instead
: of having all sorts of obsessive
: thoughts and worries going through
: my mind, I started looking around
: me and enjoying people's gardens
: and the sky and the birds and the
: noise the poplar leaves make when
: the wind is blowing and so many
: other things. So when my dog would
: linger endlessly sniffing a spot,
: I would just enjoy my
: surroundings. In the winter, I'd
: take her to the beach and let her
: run, and I would enjoy the waves.
: I always think of her as my
: recovery dog, because we recovered
: together. And I have had dogs ever
: since. I cannot imagine not having
: a dog, and I cannot imagine not
: doing the program. Both have
: opened up my life in so many ways.
: I am such a different person than
: I was before the program I would
: never, ever want to go back to the
: way I felt before doing the food.
: No more blood sugar roller
: coaster, no more mean voice in my
: head telling me what a loser I am,
: no more constant mental drama, no
: more hopelessness, no more always
: feeling left out, no more feeling
: that the universe is conspiring
: against me, that unpleasant things
: in my life are punishment for
: having dared to be happy, that I
: am unlovable etc.

: Do the food, change your life. (And
: if you are an animal person, I
: highly recommend getting a dog.
: But definitely do the food.)
: Allison