My blender brilliantly comes with a tamper that fits in through the lid, but it widens at the top to prevent it going down too far -- and still I've managed to destroy a couple (and the smoothies they got ground into as well, of course). But it helps!

I totally feel your pain about the spoon -- the just-right one is a pleasure to use. I once lent one of my favorites as a prop in a play -- all the actress had to do was carry it and wave it around a little, and she managed to break it. Outside of a blender, how do you break a wooden spoon??