Venus rising on a deep blue night with the words Radiant Recovery superimposed on it
Geraint Smith Image
March 1, 2020, 
 
Hi {!firstname_fix}, 
   its. not quite spring yet, but the birds are doing funny things. The goldfinches are gobbling thistle. The cranes are getting ready to move North. I hear the calling and see them way up high playing on the thermals. It is quite amazing.
   Last week I was reflecting on why people come and why people stay. Part of these reflections have led me to realize that it is time for Radiant Recovery to regroup and update a bit. When we started, there was no social media. No Facebook, no instagram, no Twitter. When my web guys asked me what I wanted to do, I said, *Build a community for people to share their healing." They literally had no idea what I was talking about.
    Our structure emerged over time and grew in response to the things people wanted to learn and wanted to share about. No one had heard of sugar addiction so we were building the process as we went. Now there are 55 MILLION references to it on Google. Of course most of them go along the lines of "Smash Your Cravings" to "How to Break the Cycle" to "8 Foods to Bust your Sugar Cravings" to "Beating Sugar Addiction for Dummies."
    Now since I am not interested in Smashing, Beating or Breaking anything, you might well imagine that we are not in the forefront of that wave. But in the face of all that fluff, I realized it is time for us to refocus and simplify what we are doing. We will be doing some clearing out, doing less,  deepening what we do best - which is rewiring brains and HEALING your life. The story is not just about stopping the sugar or the cravings, it is about understanding who you are and how to change things.
    We will be taking down some of the lists, and focusing on the development of the main community sharing. We are not fancy nor yelling, we are more like a little Bistro on a quiet street where you can come and sit with buckwheat crepes and have a cup of tea with your friends. We will be talking more about this as we tidy up. You know I am interested in your thoughts and ideas.  Look for the conversations on the lists.
   
 
Support for Your Program
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COMMUNITY CONVERSATIONS
                                                                                         Conversations are grouped into topics so you can search for something you are interested in and join in, or you can start a new topic. This discussion is held on a list at our host service.

People are talking, bring your questions and ideas!.It is nice place to get started if you are new to the community and are wondering what to do. Join it now.

 

GROUPS
The groups list is up on the web site. Just sign up for the group you would like to join. Read about the group before you ask to join.
 
CLASSES
We do classes in several ways. Some classes are done right on the lists and there is no added charge for them. Some classes are done separately a couple of times a year.   We will announce any classes here in the newsletter.
 
RANCH
This a time to learn how to the do the program in a way that you can get nowhere else. The dates will be May 15-16-17. If you go over to register and get confused that it says it is free, click on the drop down box to determine how to pay. Email me if you have any questions.
 
JOIN US ON FACEBOOK
If you prefer talking on Facebook, come over to one of our three groups there. Radiant Recovery®, Radiant Recovery® International or Radiant Recovery® Germany  
 
WORKING WITH KATHLEEN 
Coaching is a special offering for people who are serious about enhancing their programs and would like to have ongoing coaching. Kathleen personally runs the coaching groups.This is not a class but is a process to support your progress. We have added a special chat for people in coaching. It meets twice a week to accommodate those who are in Greenwich Mean Time and those who are in USA time.
    Coaching includes several options now: Return to Radiance Coaching for those who have done the steps in the past and then drifted and would like to get back on track. Skilled Coaching is for people who are steady on the steps and ready to work on Step 7 life skills.  
    If you wish to join sign up for coaching and then we can talk about which section to join.
 
Sign up for group coaching
 
    I also provide individual intensive coaching called Signature Coaching.  It can help you step out of the craziness of sugar addiction, return to steadiness and clarity after slipping away, slow down and focus on your recovery, or deepen a steady rhythm of recovery.
    This is a 3 month process that includes doing an in-depth assessment of where you are in the process, designing an individual plan for you and then meeting once a week via phone or Skype to work on your progress.
     This is the way to step out of feeling overwhelmed with where to start and what to do. Because it is so individualized, we can work on what is right for you at this point in your journey.  People tell me that coaching helps them feel safe and focused. We work with your style, your rhythm. This is a unique opportunity to release your fear and let go of shame.The guidance can shorten and ease your process so that in 3 months you will do what you might take a year to do on your own. Signature coaching is also an excellent way to tackle any special needs you may have. like wanting to get sober, or dealing with insulin resistance, or special medical concerns.
 
Sign up for Signature Coaching
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"Resting when you are tired may seem like an outrageous idea, but learning to take care of your body is the focus of your path to recovery."
 
Testimonial of the Week

   

I've been thinking about how Radiant Recovery gives us so much, like the ability to find joy in even the simplest things. As well as running outside this morning, catching snowflakes and listening to the wonderful snowy silence, I was struck by the thought just now of how pleasurable it is not to have to peel potatoes any more!

 

And, yes, that means I'm actually doing some cooking!

 

What simple joyful things are you all doing today?

 

Jenny
 

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David, my oldest son, runs our store. He makes sure your orders go out quickly and works with you to find the best things suited to where you are in your process. 

Please send questions and suggestions. I love hearing from you and truly want to help you do your program better. I am putting Restore in again because you got so excited about it.

 

Come visit our STORE. Call 505-345-3737.
what else is embedded
Order What Else is Embedded
This is the CD that includes the discussion of What Else is Embedded in the Steps.
 
Your Last Diet: More Than What You Think
Your Last Diet Book Cover

 When should you join YLD?  Anytime you want to be able to talk about losing weight. You DON'T have to be on step 7 to join us. We soon will be talking about the gene codes that determine whether you will be a slow loser or a fast loser and what to do about it. And ironically, it is NOT just for people who want to lose weight. It really is for anyone wanting to real time connection and problem solving every week. Nothing like it!

 There is a lifetime membership fee of $99 to join YLD. This means if you go away for 5 years to try all sorts of other things that don't work and come back, you still have a membership and a great welcome!

 

If you would like to join us in YLD, come find us here.  
 
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What If None of This Has to Be Hard

by Kathleen DesMaisons, PhD

 

    

As many of you know, we often talk about addiction to misery and always believing that things have to be *hard*. Here is the original reflection that started this dialogue in our community..

 

What if none of it has to be hard? This is the radical thought that has followed me home from Ranch. Kathleen had been talking about addiction to misery and how it seems to be one of the easier pieces of our sug sen puzzle to fix - it doesn't have t be hard. And then she blurts out what if none of it has to be hard? I think most everyone's instant reaction was "huh? I don't think so," me included. But the hair on the back of my neck stood up when she said that. And I have not been able to get this idea out of my mind.

 

I was listening to a (country) CD in the car and it seemed every song was about some kind of "hard". And a voice in my head is saying "What if it doesn't have to be hard?" I looked at my shoes that have been by my bed for weeks now patiently waiting for me to wake, shake, walk. And the voice again "What if it doesn't have to be hard?" I came home to what could have felt like and overwhelm of laundry, no groceries, starting the potato and the need to gain weight. But what if it doesn't have to be hard? And the laundry and groceries got done. The potatoes are ready in the fridge. I'm remembering to eat a little more than usual. These are, I realize, simple things, easy to not be hard. But what if none of it has to be hard?

 

I've been thinking about why I am so invested in things being "hard". I was brought up in a culture that taught 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps', 'nothing worth having is easy', 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger', 'true beauty lies in struggle and pain' and so on. And I am very attached to the idea of having been "brave" in my recovery journey. I think the dopamine boosting reward factor is in play, too when I feel I've done something "hard".

 

So what happens if I let go of the idea of doing what's hard = worthy accomplishment. If it's easy will there be that sense of accomplishment? Will the act of letting go of "hard" be the accomplishment? Maybe it is all in the re-framing. What if instead of "hard" and "how can I possibly do what seems impossible and just too difficult and where in the world do I start?" the "hard" thing becomes a challenge and the doing of it an adventure?

 

The feeling/idea of my life being an adventure instead of a struggle is something I have been becoming aware of as I've done my post detour work. If I stop and look at the past 7 months what started out as hard became easy. Not easy as in in being a piece of cake (sorry) but easy as in being a joy to do. I have come to think of my regular life as a grand adventure, too. It still has it's moments of scary-as-all-get-out but it doesn't spook me any more. And I think maybe that is another key - seeing "easy" as joyous instead of just easy and not really valuable. So if "hard" becomes an adventure and "easy" becomes a joyous thing to do, then "what if none of it has to be hard" becomes pursuing the business of life as a joyous adventure. This idea feels incredibly real and true to me.

 

Would I have been ready for it at the beginning of recovery? I honestly don't know. I think I might have said "this is nuts, I'm outta here". It's hard (no make that it's a joyous adventure ;-) ) to turn our long held, deeply embedded, highly invested way of being in the world upside down with such a radical thought. I am ready to give it a go. By the way, I got up and put my shoes on and walked for 20 min. this morning :-D Turns out it didn't have to be hard.

 

I'd love to hear other's thoughts on this idea of it doesn't have to be hard. Thanks as always for listening to my long ramble.

 

Janice in Maryland
 
©2020 Kathleen DesMaisons. All rights reserved. You are free to use or transmit this article to your blog or website as long as you leave the content unaltered, use this attribution: "By Kathleen DesMaisons, Ph.D. of Radiant Recovery®, and notify kathleen@radiantrecovery.com of the location. Please visit the Radiant Recovery® website at for additional resources on sugar sensitivity and healing addiction. 

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