Pouring rain
July 10, 2022,
 
Hi {!firstname_fix}, 
  And now there are 3 rabbits. I do not have a garden, so I am not alarmed by the bunny population increasing. They come into the front yard in the morning when it is still cool and wet with dew. They eat the grass. Hawks or coyotes try to grab them, but Brody keeps the coyotes at bay and I suspect the hawks know he is there protecting the rabbits as well.  He does chase the rabbits but they are incredibly fast, resilient and agile and dash for cover under the sage brush across the street.
   Our new YLD Zoom chats have been going well. Last week's meeting had people from Israel, the UK, Germany, Australia and New Mexico, New Jersey, Mississipi, New York, Oregon, California. When I imagined a global support system all those years ago, I never imagined we would be sitting in one room in real time. I feel incredibly blessed to have the fruits of all this work and time and commitment look like that. real time, same sugar sensitivity. We talked about pain and beta endorphin, about dieting and restriction. We had people who were just starting and people with 20 years. There was a lot of laughter and a. lot of problem solving.
    Things are quieter these days.  I think our new people have settled into a routine, the middlers are getting skills and simply progressing with it and the old timers are discovering the art of renewal.  It is a nice collection.
    I have felt a personal shift in my heart. Watching the hearings has been intense. My intuitive self "knew" much of what we are hearing about, but hearing it spoken and seeing the interactions was making me feel ill, angry and disengaged. I had an insight and realized that oftentimes we who grew up in dysfunctional families were imprinted with the response pattern of "learned helplessness". It was as if a lightbulb came on. I thought to myself, "Take action, Kathleen." You are not helpless.
    I went online. I learned who my senators really are, who my representative is besides her name. I learned all the different ways that I can contact them. I learned what committees they sit on and how they are voting. And then I went and did the same thing for the state level. And I am learning who is driving the redistricting and I will learn the motivation for it. I will learn about who was on the slate of fake electors. I will know their names and their connections and I will learn who is driving the force. And I will let my people know where I stand and who they are representing.
    And if one person complains to me from this community for talking "politics" in a "food" space (it has happened before), I will remind them that this is actually a space of recovery. And I intend to role model the antidote for learned helplessness.
      
Support for Your Program
Journals
COMMUNITY CONVERSATIONS
                                                                                   

 We have a master community email list. It is nice place to get started if you are new to the community or are coming back and are wondering what to do.  Introduce yourself and ask for help. Or just listen. We won't mind. The community is made up of a huge number of introverts which means LISTENING is held in high esteem. We will direct you to the right spot for your questions. It's fine if you know nothing, just stop in and you will be welcomed.

It is also the place to ask about things like what to do with your sugar intake in the afternoon while you are still on Step 1 and we won't open that discussion on the Step 1 list because we stick to the topic of learning how to do StepOne and won't talk about sugar LOL.    Join the Step One List now.

 

GROUPS
The groups list is up on the web site. Just sign up for the group you would like to join. Read about the group before you ask to join. If you are starting or returning, join the Step One list. Don't join Step One and Step Two and Step Three all at the same time. If you. have any trouble joining, send me an email at kathleen@radiantrecoverycom and we will get you all set.
 
CLASSES
Step Two: Learn the basics and learn why Step Two is such a powerful aide to the success of your program. I haven't offered this class for 2 years, and I have never added in a Zoom component before so I think it will be really fun. The class will start with a Zoom meeting  for one hour, will continue by email for 2 weeks and then will end with a second Zoom meeting. The cost is $29.95.  I will schedule when I have 10 people.
Sign up here. 
 
JOIN US ON FACEBOOK
If you prefer talking on Facebook, come over to our group there. Radiant Recovery®,.
 
WORKING WITH KATHLEEN 
People have been asking for a long time how they might be able to work with me directly.  I provide individual one on one intensive coaching called Signature Coaching.  I can help you step out of the craziness of sugar addiction, return to steadiness and clarity after slipping away, slow down and focus on your recovery, or deepen a steady rhythm of recovery. This particular option is especially helpful if you did the steps a while ago and then kinda meandered away. Or if you are facing some intense times and would. like skillful support. 
This particular level of coach involves sharing your food journal and assessing where you are in the process on a whole different level.  It is a big step and an act of commitment because generally we are told "do not tell" how it really is.
     Signature coaching offers several options. Most people do a 90 day process that includes doing an in-depth assessment of where you are in the process, designing an individual plan for you and then talking with me once a week via phone or Zoom to work on your progress. You will learn to do an efficient journal and to identify your strengths and challenges.  
    Other people chose to do a month long intensive to get a sense of whether the process is suited to their style. And some people continue to work beyond the initial 3 months in special arrangements we work out for their budget and progress. All signature coaching starts with an initial assessment meeting at no charge to you. This time allows us to collaborate on the best way to work with your food and style.
   
    And in fact, we have developed some creative personalized plans especially suited to where people are in the program and what will work best to support them.You can go here to learn more about it.  Call 505-345-3737 if you would like more information. I am ALWAYS happy to talk to. you about options. We can do a "meet and greet".

 

 

Testimonial for the Week

 

I have to share what a moving and profound experience last night's

chat was for me. The whole ambivalence, commitment, fear thing is

exactly what I have been working through the last few months as I

struggled to figure out why I never got beyond step 2. It happened

just like Kathleen said, I got friendly with my ambivalence and I

found my fear. I am afraid of where radiance might take me. I cannot

imagine me radiant. There are bound to be a lot of changes and

that scared me enough to keep me stuck at step one for 2 1/2 years.

 

But once I found the fear and could name it I was able to commit to

healing anyway. I'm a month into my 3 month commitment to post on

the forum and Kathleen is right again about it being about my heart

wanting to do whatever it takes rather than self-discipline. I post

whether I 'feel' like it or not. I eat 3 meals a day whether I 'feel

like it or not. And it does not feel like self-discipline, it just

feels like 'doing it' because I want healing rather than to hide in

my fear. Journaling is even getting easier.

 

So I sat in front of this computer screen with a lump in my throat

and tears in my eyes last night because Kathleen was putting my

life into words and I could 'see' that I will be radiant one day

and I won't be afraid anymore. Until then I will just hang out with

my fear and know that my commitment to RR (heart connection) is

stronger.

 

Janice. 2003

Radiant Recovery Store
David Smiling
    David, my oldest son, runs our store. He makes sure your orders go out quickly and works with you to find the best things suited to where you are in your process.
I have recently heard that a number of current YLD members do not have a YLD book. We have some extra copies and will offer them to you at a special price of $4.99. 
   

  We are featuring the journal this week because Kathleen is planning A Step Two: Journaling class. Be prepared for the best!

Come visit our STORE. Call 505-345-3737.

Omega 3 Gummies

 
The original and best Food Journal for doing the steps outlined in Potatoes Not Prozac.




Your Body Speaks
Your Last Diet: A Surprise Awaiting
Your Last Diet Book Cover

    After all this time YLD continues to be a favorite place for people in the community. If you struggle with your body image, if you have chased diets for years, here is a wonderful alternative to all the things you have tried.

Here is a quote from a YLD member:

    It has been quite a while since I checked in with you folks. It was not because I wasn't following the plan or had lost interest. Life was unusually stressful from early Dec to the present and I have been putting "stress management" at the top of my agenda. I continue to be absolutely in awe of what Kathleen has discovered. I feel I have found "my home" - a place where I feel at peace with my body. I weighed myself today for the first time in 2 months - I have lost 10-12 pounds since starting on this journey with you. And, more importantly, I feel so good in my body. I've read with interest what some of you have been saying about the loss of emotional energy around weight loss. This feeling of being OK with where I am now - no, not just OK, but radiant - is incredible.

***********************************************************************************

 

    If you are not a YLD member, come and join us. Click here if you are ready to change your life or just plain ole have fun. We have 2 YLD ZOOM. meetings each week as part of the offerings included in your membership. They are a time for connection and learning. We are looking at all sorts of intriguing ideas like "Why we crave chocolate and why some people don't" [it's genetic LOL].

strawberries
 

 Learned Helplessness 

 

     Kathleen DesMaisons, PhD

 

When we are exposed to shock and pain, the body releases beta-endorphin to protect us. The beta-endorphin "numbs out" our physical and emotional feelings, soothes us and keeps us safe.

 

Beta-endorphin is a powerful brain chemical. Morphine and heroin evoke a beta-endorphin response, so you can well imagine why we get attached to the feeling even if it comes in response to "bad" things happening.

 

I believe that sugar-sensitive people have lower levels of beta-endorphin. The brain compensates for this by opening up more beta-endorphin receptor sites so we get a bigger response to its effects.

 

Sugar Sensitive Comfort

 

Because of this heightened response, we are drawn to things that evoke beta endorphin-alcohol, opiate drugs such as morphine, heroin, percodan, codeine, sugars, fats and white things. The things we call "comfort foods" are usually the ones that are evoking a beta-endorphin response in us.

 

Sugar-sensitive people are more attached to these foods than other people are. We find more emotional comfort in these foods because we are getting a bigger beta-endorphin "hit" from them. We not only feel good at the moment, but our body "remembers" that beta-endorphin means "safe." The feelings of comfort and emotionalsafety become linked.

 

 

As many of you have been reading Potatoes Not Prozac, you have really come to understand how powerful an effect beta-endorphin has on our behavior and our eating. But the story is bigger than you may have realized.

 

More  to the Story than Food

 

The comfort and numbing effects of beta-endorphin can become cumulative over time. When emotional trauma or "numbing" occurs repeatedly, the soothing quality of the beta-endorphin that is evoked shifts into something really problematic. The numbing from trauma (or from long-term, heavy use of sugars) becomes generalized into what is called learned helplessness.

 

Those of you who suffered childhood abuse, molestation or incest, or who have experienced any kind of adult trauma get a triple whammy. Bad things happened and your brain literally kept you alive by cushioning you from the mind-blowing reality of your pain. You were flooded with the soothing protection of beta-endorphin. The flood of brain chemicals numbed you in the face of things that you had no control over.

 

You  learned to be helpless in two ways. One, you literally were helpless in the face of the bad things that kept happening and two, the biochemical reaction which wassaving your life did also generalized into the biochemical pattern of learned helplessness.

 

You  survived the bad things that happened over and over, but the learned helplessness remains encoded in your body. The pattern will be both unconscious and deeply affected by what you are eating and what you are doing.

 

Learned Helplessness in Action

 

Our many discussions about foods and sugars have taught you the impact of eating sweet foods. If you have comfort foods, you get triggered and you want more. If you try to stop, you experience withdrawal. And if you are using a lot of them, you feel overwhelmed and hopeless. This is learned helplessness in action. It may be a

feeling that is very familiar to you.

 

However,  you may not realize that there are other things besides foods that can trigger these feelings and activate a global sense of learned helplessness.

 

Recreating Safety

 

As  an adult you may have intuitively found ways to recreate this feeling of beta-endorphin "safety" not just with substances, but with activities. The bad news is that the activities you may be drawn to are harmful. That is, you may unconsciously recreate the early trauma in order to get the beta-endorphin release that will make you "safe" from your pain and reinforce your feelings of helplessness.

 

You can unconsciously be drawn to abusive situations because the abuse  evokes the comfort of beta-endorphin. You may even create bad situations like having your utilities turned off or your credit taken away  because inside the "bad" experience is coded

with the biochemical memory of of beta-endorphin comfort.

 

The more these bad things happen, the more helpless and inadequate you feel. You simply feel "done to" and have no idea that you areunconsciously participating in creating these situations as a way to stay in a familiar and safe pattern. And the more helpless and inadequate you feel, the more you want to eat ice cream and chocolate. So the spiral goes down and down.

 

As you start taking care of the food, you assume that things will get better. You cannot understand why you keep slipping into old and perhaps abusive situations at the very time you are committed to being so intentional about your healing.

 

The Drive For Beta Endorphin

 

Beta-endorphin withdrawal will drive you to get beta-endorphin -even at the price of abuse. Learned helplessness will wind its sticky little arms around you. And you will feel terrible shame because now you think you "should" know better. You may not understand this at all. You may assume it's a personal problem.  You may either feel

victimized or totally inadequate. You may not have a clue about the biochemistry of it, and may feel that the only way out is years of therapy. Even then, therapy can take care of the "feelings" but not the biochemistry.

 

The joy of the biochemistry is that you can change it fairly quickly. You can start to see that learned helplessness is one of those sugar feelings. It may be deeply encoded, it may be sticky, but the reality is that you are in charge.

 

That Which Causes The Problem Can Heal It

 

Learn about beta-endorphin and you can set yourself free with a sense of purpose and power that you could never have imagined. You have started to learn that there are many things that raise beta-endorphins (BE's) other than abuse. Exercise, prayer, meditation, sexual intimacy,  playing with your pets, healthy food and laughter, enjoying your  grandchildren, holding babies,and music. Lot's of options! But you gotta choose them to take them.

 

Learned helplessness usually means that your first line of action is to retreat and isolate_the worst things you can do. Healing requires one choice at a time, BE's the good ways. BE intentional (be beta-endorphin-intentional) when you feel overwhelmed. Hold the ice cream and CHOOSE from the list above of healthy beta-endorphin-evoking activities.

 

For Further Reading:

 

Maier, SF et al, The opioid/nonopioid nature of stress-induced

analgesia and learned helplessness .J Exp Psychol Anim Behav

Process , 1983 Jan:9(1):80-90.

Miczek KA et al, Opioid-like analgesia in defeated mice .Science,

1982 Mar 19; 215(4539:1520-2.

Segato FN, Sucrose ingestion causes opioid analgesia .Braz J Med

Bio Res , 1997 Aug:30(8);981-4.

Tejedor-Real P, et al, Implication of endogenous opioid system

in the learned helpless model of depression .Pharmacol Biochem

Behav , 1995 Sep;52(1);145-5

 
 

This is Grace unfolding. You are not alone.

©2022 Kathleen DesMaisons. All rights reserved. You are free to use or transmit this article to your blog or website as long as you leave the content unaltered, use this attribution: "By Kathleen DesMaisons, Ph.D. of Radiant Recovery®, and notify kathleen@radiantrecovery.com of the location. Please visit the Radiant Recovery® website at for additional resources on sugar sensitivity and healing addiction. 

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